Thoughts

There come nights at work, once in a while, where it feels like it's all I can do to keep from drowning. I tread water as hard as I can, doing my best to keep all my priorities straight and be the best nurse I can be. Despite this, I still feel like I must be failing. Surely things are not as crazy or tough as I feel. I must just suck. I wonder if I'm really cut out for this, if the babies would be better off with another nurse...with someone who doesn't feel so muddled and overwhelmed when the going gets tough. When I am still at work long after my shift supposedly ended, trying to piece together my charting and make sure the next nurse has as smooth sailing as possible. And then, my charge nurse (who was also still at work, trying to wrap things up from our shift), comes over to check on me, pats me on the back and says, "You did a wonderful job last night. These (particular type of sick babies) are really tough." And then, I know I am right where I am supposed to be, doing exactly what I am supposed to be doing.